Turning Lemons Into Lemonade
3 Life Lessons That Prove Worrying Just Might Be Unproductive
I can remember the day they told me I would need ileostomy surgery. As sick as I was when the doctors delivered this news to me, I remember thinking that this was my worst nightmare come true.
What would life be like? How would I look with this unwelcome appendage? What would people think? Even my mother, a medical professional and a true believer in modern medicine, let on that she was worried about how difficult the reactions of others would be for me when they knew or noticed.
You might say I was lucky I was so sick at that point. I could only give my fears a little bit of time and attention—though I do remember as they wheeled me into surgery lamenting the fact that because of some unwanted bag, I would never be the same again.
Fast forward 2 years, and I look back on those early days and laugh at myself. That little ostomy bag seemed like such a monumental worry. Now, quite frankly, it’s pretty inconsequential. Granted, those first days in the hospital post-surgery, I purposely kept it covered by my bed sheets. But friends and family came and went, and no one said a word…no ‘what’s that like anyway’…no ‘I’m sorry’s’. It was as if nothing was different at all.
1. Friends, Workarounds, and Reddit Chats: Always a Bright Side
I’m lucky I have such great friends and family. They’re here for the count. Unconditionally. Their sense of humor and sick jokes have made my transition into ostomy life pretty uneventful when it comes to the emotional and psychological side of things. Physically, a special belt I use to cover my pouch holds it in place and makes it unnoticeable under my clothing.
Truthfully, the bag itself, originally my biggest worry, has turned out to be pretty insignificant. The bigger worries have come from the skin irritations, and they can get pretty bad. Each time I go to change my ostomy, I do worry about what I’ll find around the stoma where the bag touches my skin. It’s gotten pretty bad sometimes but I’m on the case with my doctors, calls to the ostomy nurses, and especially the discussions I’ve had on Reddit. Those discussions have not only connected me with fellow ostomates but also have provided some of the best most simple solutions for that.
2. Productive Pursuits: Always a Substitute for Worry
The gas, too. was a real pain. When the bag filled with gas, I became self-consciousness that people would actually “see” it under my clothes. But my tech background and my tendency to use tech hacks to solve problems led to my developing Ostoh. The device has helped me, and I know when Ostoh launches, it will help other ostomates with similar gas build-up problems.
My ostomy has also helped me to be more conscious of what I eat and motivated me to publish a guide, Food and Hydration Tracking Journal that helps us ostomates chart our food and liquid intake and monitor the way it affects our bodies to learn what’s best to eat and drink and how this improves overall well-being.
From what I see and read online, other ostomates are using their ostomies to inspire them to great heights. Talk shows, support groups, advocacy and lobbying in Washington. Each of these accomplishments have been undertaken by people who turn challenges into opportunities that help themselves grow and find fulfillment as they help themselves and, if not more importantly, others.
3. Beyond Yourself: Always the Possibility for a New Outlook
But beyond me and a focus on my own limited issues, something else unexpected happened: I opened myself to the perspectives and possibilities showcased by other ostomates. Look on almost any ostomate’s Instagram page, and you’ll see people wearing ostomies gratefully, proudly, and openly as the beautiful body additions that saved their lives, gave them quality of life, and inspired them to accomplish great things.
There are even some companies that design ostomies in different colors or created ostomy covers with soft fabric, bright colors, and cool slogans. These ostomates and companies have turned ostomies into accessories instead of eye sores…turned them into strengths not weaknesses…turned them into assets not liabilities.
Just goes to show that with ostomies and, really, everything: Life is all about perspective. Worrying is basically unproductive because as I’ve seen myself, much of what we worry about never actually happens.
When you really come right down to it, making the best of whatever curve balls life throws at us and then some can even transform those curve balls into grand slams and homeruns.
Life has an unusual way of pushing us to where we need to go. To me, that’s what Ostoh is all about.
If you’re interested in learning more about Ostoh and how it might increase your comfort, email us at hello@ostoh.com or use our contact form. Our goal is to make your ostomy life easier and make you feel what it means to be yourself.