5 Pointers To Make Your Partner, Spouse or Caregiver Better Help You
When you come home from the hospital following your ostomy surgery it’s helpful to have some caregiving support. This caregiving can make all the difference in your transition. If you or your caregiver are brainstorming ways to make the adjustment into everyday life easier, the below list of things that mattered to me may help you adjust.
1. Eating and Drinking Right
Left on my own, I would have had a lot more trouble with eating and drinking appropriately during those first weeks at home. Getting up to eat and drink was hard enough, so I relinquished control to my wife, Michelle. Having her keep on top of appropriate meal selections—even if my meals were mostly mashed potatoes which she mashed—and making sure I had the right amount to drink made for an easier time during those first few weeks.
2. Anticipating Your Needs
I’m lucky because Michelle knows my likes and dislikes—things like tech magazines, video games, and on an as-need basis, the particular things that make ostomy and related adjustments more tolerable. If you have a special someone in your life, they likely know your hobbies and pastimes and other fun things that distract you. Michelle had all these things waiting for me at home. She even jumpstarted her gift-giving: a pair of special earmuffs to blunt noise when I was in the hospital. Don’t be shy if a friend, family member, or professional caregiver is the person helping you. Make your needs known so that they can provide you with the things that will entertain, distract, and calm you.
3. Finding Humor and Staying Steady
As we all know, funky things can happen when you change your bag, have gas, or fail to get a new bag on properly. Over time, you will learn to deal with these issues. But at first, all this stuff can make you self-conscious…make you feel all thumbs. A partner, spouse, or caregiver who stays steady when things go wrong, who is not squeamish…someone who can even make you see the humor in the situations you face…helps you get through the worst of things, makes you feel you’re getting back to normal, and goes a long way to diffusing your stress and discomfort.
4. Matching Moods
A caregiver or companion who can recognize what you’re feeling about your new life as an ostomate helps with your transition. On the one hand, when a caregiver displays optimism, and again has a sense of humor, it can get you out of a bad move or, on a down day, make you feel more hopeful. On the other hand, it’s also helpful for a caregiver to respond to one of your real down in the dumps days with an “Oh, yeah. This thing sucks.” Doing that allows you to fully experience your feelings. That “permission” can also help you more quickly accept your new status.
5. Preventing an All-Thumbs Experience
It’s easy to feel like a klutz during your first and many early appliance changes. This is as much about learning to manage the appliance and the transition from 1 bag to another as it is to juggle all the ancillary products involved with the change: adhesive, sprays, a ring, the new bag itself. Having someone on hand to check list your supplies and hand them to you makes your early bag change challenges less burdensome.
Life has an unusual way of pushing us to where we need to go. To me, that’s what Ostoh is all about.
If you’re interested in learning more about Ostoh and how it might increase your comfort, email us at hello@ostoh.com or use our contact form. Our goal is to make your ostomy life easier and make you feel what it means to be yourself.